Friday, January 11, 2008

2007 Gravy Awards part 1

Gravy Crane Durham said...
I'll be handing out my 2007 Gravy Awards over the next few days.

The Gravy is a gold plated gravy-boat mounted on a decorative marble base. No other bric-a-brac in the world endows one's mantel with the prestige of a Gravy.

Prior to awarding the 2007 Gravys', let us first start with a new feature, our Lifetime Achievement Awards.

First off....The Lifetime Achievement Award for Carpetbagging goes to the person who has most defined the genre. Sweaty "Donna Dills" Pickle.

The Lifetime Achievement Awardfor Carpet-Wearing also goes to another person who has risen above the fray and is now considered Overland's resident master of disguise. Kenny "the Coach" Blowensme.

Gravy Crane Durham said...
This year's Gravy for Best Use of a Pedophile in Municipal Politics and Civil Lawsuits goes to Ann Purzner for her retaining Eric Tolens in the Dody v. Purzner Sunshine Law Hubbub.

In addition, this year's Gravy for Best Use of an Ass Counter as Expert Witness by a Pedophile in Municipal Politics and Civil Lawsuit goes to Sweaty "Donna Dills" Pickle. Although she didn't directly retain Tolens, Tolens reliance on Sweaty's Council Meeting Ass Counts in Dody v. Purzner Sunshine Law Hubbub is legendary.
Special mention also goes to Sweaty for her tireless defense of her association with Eric Tolens. Sweaty says she wouldn't know a pedophile if he came up and .... represented her thus relieving her of any culpability in her relations with Mr. Tolen.

More from the 1st Annual Academy of Reasonable Analysis Gravy Awards after these messages.

1 comment:

Tom said...

Just when I was starting to think Sweaty must have met her maker and then just like a sabeteous cyst on your ass she reappears oozing with puss and staph, desperate, shriveled and of course sour.

Oh what about that deal you made with the Mayor Sweaty???? You know........